I Want to See

If there’s anything that 2016 has taught me it’s that I am a man who wants to see.

In the ancient gospel story of blind Bartimaeus, Jesus was walking on crowded streets when a particular shout transcended the many and varied voices among him, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!”

Apparantely, something about that distinct cry captivated Jesus.

In the gospel of Mark as well as the gospel of John physical blindness stood as a powerful symbol for the terrible blindness of soul that all of us experience.

When the image of God grows fuzzy and our vision of grace and freedom dissipates these are the symptoms of an obscured vision plagued by our ego and its accompanying fears.

I don’t know anyone who isn’t battling with some version of fear and the accompanying anxiety laced questions. My personal fears and questions have been as poignant this year as I can ever remember. Especially in the days since Tuesday, November 8^th I’ve been hearing and holding questions such as, “Am I seeing what I think I’m seeing? How could we have not seen this coming?” Typically followed by, “What else about myself, neighbor, and God am I not seeing?”

For a variety of reasons 2016 has been a year of recognizing that my vision isn’t nearly as sharp as I may have thought it was. I’ve found myself adopting the desperate prayer of the blind man, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!”